Based on Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, conditions for this year’s Halloween party are supposed to be perfect. It is on a Saturday, the weather should really be nice (I guess…for the entire world? ), and it is a goddamn full celestial satellite. Also? It’s a few days prior to an election. People neeeed to blow off vapor! But , once again, that betch Corona V. has destroyed everything. A bunch of cities plus communities have banned trick-or-treating, and obviously big, consumed parties are a pandemic no-no. Sigh. It’s right, yet it’s not okay.
So Elvira is attractive to… I dunno, the federal government (? ) to not terminate her favorite night of the entire year. She made a songs video set to Madonna’s Holiday to plead her situation. It’s a spooktacular eco-friendly screen experience with our gal’s trademark titties, coronavirus visuals, and dancing Tiger Nobleman (played by Elvira herself).
Here’s the video:
The lyrics are certainly gold, especially this poignant verse that really drives the girl thesis home:
I am the Queen of Halloween night
COVID-19 ruined everything
When they cancel Halloween
Cuz we are still in quarantine
It might make me so mad
It will suck
It would suck therefore bad!
Elvira also handles to slag off Trump with, “But the scariest thing concerning this Halloween is that big, orange colored, fat, scary face! ” Then the girl presents an orange jack-‘o-lantern to the camera, and states, “Who’d you believe I was talkin’ about? ” Oh, Elvira, you scamp!
The most shocking thing concerning this video is that Elvira (human name: Cassandra Peterson) simply turned 69 (noice). Sixty-nine! If there was ever any kind of doubt that Elvira provides Satan on speed call, this settles it.